I smoked for twenty-two years. After many attempts, I left it twenty years ago. I used to smoke more than three packages a day. I had read somewhere that if you try it again and again, you get it.
Posts of the ActivaMent’s Blog.
World Suicide Prevention Day is celebrated on 10 September. Suicide can be prevented. We are told this.
I have never written a personal diary in my life. Until relatively recently, I kept everything about my mental health a secret. So why have I only now started to write about depression from my own experience?
At the age of thirty ( I am now sixty), after the birth of my second child, I was diagnosed with a mental disorder. I had thoughts and feelings that I didn’t understand, I knew that they formed part of another me, and I was really afraid.
It’s been thirty-seven years since I was diagnosed. And things have really changed a lot. I myself have changed. It is not just that medication to deal with a schizophrenic disorder has improved.
I think there is a certain prevailing idea that cannabis and other toxins are not of great importance to our health. Alcohol is consumed on a regular basis by millions of people. And despite all the publicity campaigns, people smoke tobacco with joy.
Anyone who has experienced an episode of depression and even more, the major depression, knows that it often entails the loss of friends, family, affection, work, etc. In a social context where everything must be cool and good vibe, we are considered “Toxic People”.
In the early days when I visited the psychiatrist and the psychologist, I often met a boy in the waiting room of that center. He was called J. and was 20 years old. I was 3 or 4 years older than him. He was dark with straight, medium length hair and tall like me. It was simple. He was distressed when they talked to him for a long time.
I would like to explain why I think psychiatrists haven’t done a good job with me. Why I consider they have arised more problems than those I already had, and turned my life more complicated than it used to be. And furthermore, why I have reasons to think they haven’t used the diagnostic criteria for DSM-IV properly.
Until a year and a half ago I had a more or less stable job, also a more or less stable life, and I had almost always been a person who fought, an enterprising person until the darkness took posses me.